Aloha Everyone!

Firstly, thank you to everyone whose given me feedback up till this point. You have helped transform this story to what you will now see, I couldn’t have done it without you, so sincerely thanks!

I’ve taken most feedback on board, so hopefully everything should be clear now, and any confusion or issues you had previously addressed :)

I NEED YOUR HELP
Please advise me on the pacing. i've looked at it for so long, I can't create a judgement. Your advise will be much appreciated.

WHAT STILL NEEDS TO BE DONE
- Need to fix colouring so it’s consistent, I know sometimes colours change (I’m colour blind), this will be fixed by Friday.

- Redraw frames I’m not happy with.

- I need to sound design this, and see if I can find better music to fit the story.

- Minor feedback you give me (I don’t think I can physically or mentally take a full re-work by Friday, todays submission took me 2 solid weeks of non stop work).

WHAT HAS BEEN ADDRESSED

Based on your feedback, the following has now been addressed: I HAVE…

- weaved the dark entity into act 1 so you see it, just before Santa’s loved ones dies (foreshadowing why death is after Santa). Please let me know if you think I should keep this or remove, I think it works either or.

- Moved map scene to start as requested by a few of you.

- Extended the time “with the map showing where Santa’s going” + a few scenes that have a lot of information, so you can have enough time to digest.

- I’ve made it as clear as possible, to show the jump in time (Calendar shots, jump from 1992, 1996,1999 and the one shot showing the date on the post box 2001) It was hard to make this organic as possible.

- The music change to indicate, Santas determination to make people believe again and then jumping back to present, has been addressed.

- Given more context on Santa’s magic, so hopefully it won’t confuse anyone no more. In the flash back scene, 02:35, I’ve shown that people needing and loving Santa, is what gives him his powers (decorating the town, giving gifts, being needed) this is also foreshadowing for why he does what he does in act 2.

- On the above note, this is also why, in the forest chase scene, he has lost his powers, because he is no longer needed. And then it comes back, when he see the girl in yellow, in need of xmas joy. This is an added layer that originally I didn’t want to include, for me the magic is always there, its up to Santa to choose when he uses it, but this way, adds a bit more drama :)

- Actually on that note, I’ve added more details and context throughout, so hopefully you can piece it all together?

- Someone said, it was not clear, why the girl in yellow would help Santa, I’ve added a scene at the start of act 2, he decorates the town to cheer her up. I’ve also added a scene where she remember Santa and is happy to see him before trying to take the gift. I’ve also added, she see’s him run past her house, seeing him in need, this little hero goes to help Santa as he’s bridged her joy.

- I have made my drawings more dynamic as much as possible (I’m not an illustrator, but I’m trying my best to push myself). Literally redrawn all of act 1, and will try to redraw more if I have time.

In short, I have listened and I have revised and reworked this, and listened to the people, and in doing so, this is our story, and it is better then it was in the earlier weeks, so thank you :)

As always, appreciate your feedback, this time round I’ll do my best to address what I can in the few days we’ve got left to fix our stories. Minor changes are welcome, anything huge, I just won’t realistically be able to address.

Also as I know someone will say it, I KNOW I'M OVER 6 MINUTES.
I've had to rewrite this story 8 times to explore different ways to cut down the story, without losing the emotional journey. what you see is the best I could do. I've tried to make it, so that everything you see is vital to the story telling. I've cut out stuff that was unnecessary. Despite being 07:50 min long, if my film sparked emotions whilst you watched, this is why it's long haha.

Finally, this might be the last time speaking to you all, so thank you for everything over the past 2-3 months. I couldn’t have done what I have, grown as much as I have, without your support and feedback (See my week 1, and then now to get what I mean).
For my regulars, if you want to stay in touch find me in
INSTAGRAM: hiro_hong

Sincerely, thank you from the bottom of my heart all, especially my regulars <3.
For one last time,
Much love
Alan Hong